Ripping Apart
by shiawase4
Summary: MxM EXTREMECrack Drabble. "and the sound of ripping was there again. And this time, his pants fell to the ground." Rated T for language.


RIIIIIP!

Mello panicked at that sound, and when he looked back at his pants, he actually wanted to scream. Quickly, he tried to make up that stupid tear in the side of his pants. So good Matt wasn't home or--

The freaking doorbell. Fuck, it was Matt. The blonde looked around, and then at himself, to check if there was nothing wrong now. Slowly, VERY SLOWLY, Mello walked towards the door and opened it, the usual 'Fuck off' face put on. Only this time with a blush.

"Mello! " Greeted Matt, grinning. As much as the blonde enjoyed the red-head's company, his happiness wasn't calming Mello down. So the blond let the red-head get in, actually stealing a kiss from him on the way and making Matt almost sing out in pleasure and general giddiness.

Slowly. He had to do things slowly today. Matt set the packages from the mafia on the kitchen table, Mello immediately asked him to store it away. More like he actually ordered the red-head to do it, Mello wasn't feeling like moving much. Soon, the blond one found that the usual constriction around his lower belly was being a bit too much, maybe he had tightened the pants-- no! That was his number, it was... ugh, he couldn't possibly be getting...

"Hey, Mello, " Came Matt's voice, interrupting Mello's thoughts. The red-head stood there for a second, blinking a bit, making the older man frown a bit, blushing.

"What...?" He asked, in a low, menacing tone, to which Matt immediately smiled. "...what the fuck is it?"

"...I finished storing your stuff. Alphabetically, just the way you like it. Some of the coke wouldn't fit under the couch so I put it in the pantry next to the gun ammo, you know? Behind the milk. " Much to Mello's annoyance, while he said this, the red-head wouldn't stop grinning, his eyes covered by the goggles he insisted on wearing.

And his head was leaning down.

At Mello's... stomach.

"...yeah, thanks. Don't just stand there... Go do... whatever it is you do when we're not fucking. " Mello said, blushing more, shoving the red-head onto the nearby couch. The red-head was still grinning as he took his goggles off, legs spread on the couch and eyes set on the blond. "...what the fuck is it, Matt? stop it. " Stop looking at... ugh, gross, Mello wasn't a... a fattie... ew.

"...you're different. " Matt said, licking his dry and cold lips a bit. "I don't know what it is. I just feel like looking at you. "

Mello sighed. "...Then don't. It's annoying, for god's sake. " The blond replied quickly. Different, he thought as he turned around, arms crossed and two of his fingers fiddling with his dangling cross, Matt couldn't see well. Only if he was really up close, or something of the like. So, he hadn't noticed, and Mello felt somewhat safe once again.

Well, until he noticed one of the coke bags was down on the ground. There, he sighed, and leaned down to get it.

...and the sound of ripping was there again. And this time, his pants fell to the ground.

"...I knew that'd happen. Your pants are always too tight. " Matt said, a little hint of a smile in his voice, which meant he was grinning evilly. "Or... your ass just happened to get bigger."

Mello wished he was dead. And then he began screaming at Matt, like always, throwing stuff at him, and finding a gun in the kitchen. "I'll fucking KILL YOU, Fucking ASSHOLE! I'LL SHOOT YOUR PRETTY FUCKING BRAINS OUT, YOU HEAR?!"

Matt just stared. And laughed. Which made the blonde feel even more miserable.

Mello pulled the trigger and shot Matt's brand new DsLite, making a nice hole through the table and the floor, making the red-head freeze. With slow steps he walked towards Matt, sitting on his lap, and placing his arms around the red-head's shoulders. "I don't have a big ass. Or am I fat. You're just my stupid... lover and I will kill you if you ever mention this again. "

With a nod, Matt smiled again. "You're trigger happy. "

"You're a fucking bastard. You get horny just watching me in my underwear."

Matt smiled at the other and slowly crept his hands up Mello's legs. "...what can I do? I get horny just looking at you. " And he touched Mello's ear with his lips, licking it after. "specially when your ass wants to rip out of your pants like that. It's fucking... fucking hot. " Yes, aroused, hot, his hips moved a bit against Mello's...

...Who had now his gun at the side of Matt's head. "..my ass is not big. " With that, he could feel Matt's hands touch his now almost bare behind, creep into his underwear like always... "Say that again and I'll... "Mello let his head lean a little back, as the red-head unzipped his top. "...I'll shoot you. "

"Fine. Your ass is huge. " Matt said, grinning and stealing a breathless kiss from the blond man. "And it makes me so fucking needy for you. "

Mello didn't answer, he put the gun down and let the red-head kiss him and touch him. Whatever, as long as Matt was there and loved him, he didn't need to buy a pair of pants that was three numbers below his -which was almost physically impossible- or worry about anything at all. Matt just made his life easy with his laziness and slow way of life. And as they kissed with more need now, Matt's hands roaming Mello's body, the blond man realized how addicted to those touches and kisses he was, how the red-head influenced him...

So in the end, Mello didn't bother much with his torn pants. Matt loved him anyway.

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**Shiawase1**


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